Sexy Red Glove

First thing in the morning that I do
After my bacon and eggs
Is put on my red mesh glove, it's true
And pretend my fingers are legs

I pretend my fingers are the sexy pins
Of a hot n' saucy girl
Two sexy, slender lady limbs
On the most beautiful man-hand in the world

I strut them down the breakfast bar
Doesn't the frilly skirt look cute
My hand is gonna be a big star
And by 'star' I mean a prostitute

I let her dance on the pepper grinder
While I hum the ‘Pretty Woman’ theme
She's my bitch and I’m her minder
We're a slick pimp and ho team

Just me and my sexy red glove, I say!
As natural as can be
But my girlfriend says if I don't throw it away
She will stop having sex with me